32 Which involves inches, pounds, rods, acres, leagues, fortnights, and shillings,
33 But never revolutions.
34 Anyway,
35 Cromwell immediately beheaded the aking,
36 And then replaced the divine right of kings system of government with a new system called the divine right of Cromwell,
37 Which was completely different, of course,
38 Since under the divine right of Cromwell, there is no king with the power of life and death over his subjects,
39 But a bProtector instead,
40 Who has the power of life and death over his subjects,
41 cBut wears no crown.
CHAPTER 161 After a while, the Brits got together and decided that the divine right of Cromwell wasn't working out,
2 dBeing no fun at all,
3 And somewhat embarrassing to boot,
4 eSince all the other nations of Europe had kings,
5 fWho were very well dressed,
6 And had started looking down on the Brits,
7 And hinting around that the Brits weren't very well bred,
8 Which is a sore subject,
9 If you happen to be a gmongrel race with a hterrible climate, a imade-up language, and ja neurotic obsession with clothing.
10 Which is why the Brits pulled off the kRestoration,
11 Which consisted of getting lCharles II down out of the mtree he had been hiding in,
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12 For twenty years or so,
13 nApologizing to him for all the unpleasantness,
14 And putting him back on the throne,
15 oWith nice new clothes,
16 pAnd a nice new crown,
17 Which fixed everything,
18 Except that it didn't.
CHAPTER 171 The tree Charles had been hiding in was in qFrance,
2 Which exposed him to the rFrench system of government,
3 sCalled the divine right of Louis's,
4 And involved lots of very expensive tparties.
5 After the Restoration, uCharles introduced the concept of parties to the Brit nobles,
6 vWho were willing to try anything once,
7 Provided that they could wear nice clothes while doing so,
8 wAnd emptied the Brit treasury in no time flat,
9 Which wasn't discovered till Charles's son went out shopping for something nice to wear at his coronation party,
10 And ran into a xrevolution instead.
11 Fortunately for the Brits,
12 No one suggested anything as radical as a return to the divine right of Cromwell,
13 Who was dead anyway,
14 But Parliament set a bunch of new world records in the King-Baiting game,
15 yWhich convinced zKing James to quit being king,
16 aaAnd rewrite the Bible instead,
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