7 This strategy was brilliantly asuccessful,
8 And convinced the Brits that all they needed to rule the world was a good bnavy, good cluck, and,
9 Of course,
10 dGood breeding.
CHAPTER 141 Elizabethe capped her triumphant reign by beheading her principal challenger for the throne,
2 fMary Queen of gScots, the current Catholic Pretender,
3 Then dying without having a son, which led to the preferred Brit political situation,
4 hWhich is a mad scramble for the throne.
5 This led to iKing James,
6 And then jKing Charles I,
7 Who made a mistake.
CHAPTER 151 It turned out that King Charles was so busyk looking for Catholic Pretenders that he forgot to look for Protestant Revolutionaries,
2 Who therefore sneaked up on him from behind,
3 lWhich wasn't fair, of course,
4 But worked pretty well.
5 The Protestant Revolutionaries called themselves Puritans,
6 And had a lot of peculiar ideas,
7 mWhich they got from reading the Bible,
8 nSomewhat too literally, the way the Brit nobles looked at it.
9 For example, the Puritans believed that being well dressed was a kind of ovanity,
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10 And was therefore not permissible behavior for good Christians,
11 Which threatened the whole Brit culture,
12 Because if no one was well dressed, how could you tell who was well bred?
13 pAnd if you couldn't tell who was well bred, how could you figure out who had the divine right to be king?
14 When the Brit nobles made this clever argument to qOliver Cromwell,
15 Who was the leader of the Puritans,
16 rAnd therefore not very well bred,
17 He agreed,
18 Much to the surprise of the nobles,
19 And came up with a totally unexpected solution,
20 sWhich was to have no king at all.
21 This thoroughly un-British viewpoint led to a twar,
22 Naturally,
23 Between the very well-dressed Brit nobles,
24 Called Cavaliers,
25 uBecause they looked so dashing on horseback,
26 And the very poorly dressed Puritans,
27 Called Roundheads,
28 vBecause they had such bad haircuts.
29 The disgraceful appearance of the Puritan troops was so distracting to the Cavaliers that they lost the war,
30 Which doesn't really count, of course,
31 Owing to the peculiar Brit method of counting,
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