49 Except Shakespeare, of course,
50 Which is why Hollywood will never be able to plug up this enormous hole in the history of our forebears,
51 And won't even try.
CHAPTER 211 And there will even be some great movies about the Frogs,
2 Which will show everyone just how glorious war can be,
3 Especially a movie called 'War and Something,'
4 Which will be all about Napoleon Bonaparte,
5 And some of the Russians who fought against him,
6 Such as Natasha,
7 Who will be played by aAudrey Hepburn,
8 Even though the one Napoleon really loves is bJean Simmons,
9 cWho thinks Napoleon looks just like Marlon Brando,
10 dUnless it's really Rod Steiger he looks like,
11 But in any case, Josephine thinks he's great,
12 Unless her name is really Desirée,
13 Which it couldn't be,
14 Because Napoleon loves Josephine,
15 eWhich everyone knows from history,
16 Right up to the day he lost everything at fWaterloo,
17 gAnd had to be exiled to somewhere or other,
18 hWhich happened after the big scene with all the bare feet in the bloody snow outside Moscow,
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19 iNot to mention the sunken road,
20 Which Marlon would have seen if he hadn't been thinking about jJean so much,
21 And would have done something about,
22 Instead of sit down on a klog and do nothing,
23 lWhich is the worst thing a soldier can do,
24 Even if he's desperately in love,
25 Because there was a Brit admiral named mLord Nelson,
26 Played by nLaurence Olivier,
27 Who wasn't doing nothing,
28 Even though he loved oLady Hamilton in the worst way,
29 What with her being pVivien Leigh and all,
30 But that didn't stop qLaurence from being the star of Trafalgar,
31 And dying victoriously in the arms of his assistant right there on the poop deck,
32 rThus explaining why Napoleon lost out in the end,
33 Including sJean,
34 And the whole Frog empire too,
35 Which shows why t'War and Something' will be one of the greatest movies ever made,
36 Although it won't be the greatest movie ever made,
37 Because that's another movie altogether,
38 Called u'How the War Was Won'.
CHAPTER 221 Yes, there will be a truly mega-spectacular blockbuster that will show everyone what happened in the American vCivil War,
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