Previous Table of Contents Next
7 No matter what it was God wanted.
8 In return for this sort of behavior, God agreed to look after the Chosen Tribe in his own special way,
9 aSeeing to it, for example, that the Chosen Tribe would be specially singled out for persecution by every other tribe on the earth,
10 Forever.
11 When they saw what a great Covenant they had made,
12 The Chosen Tribe built a special ark to keep it in,
13 So that they could read it whenever they got bconfused,
14 Which was plenty,
15 What with one thing and another.

CHAPTER 5
1 But in spite of the apple and sin and guilt and the Covenant,
2 cThe Chosen Tribe also believed that God loved them,
3 dEven if he had a funny way of showing it,
4 Such as threatening to destroy everyone in the world,
5 Which he did every so often,
6 eLike whenever he got mad.
7 And then one time when he was really mad,
8 He went ahead and did it,
9 fAnd destroyed everybody in a tremendous gflood,
10 Except for hNoah and the ipassengers he took on his ark,
11 jWhich wasn't the same ark they kept the Covenant in,
12 Because when kNoah asked for help in building his,
13 The lleaders told him that one ark was enough for any Chosen Tribe,
a.Boul.23.1
b.Chr.10.6
c.Boul.18.6
d.Lies.13.8
e.Lies.4.14
f.Rat.12.5
g.Ann.6.23
Ed.78.11
Ann.2.32
h.Psay.5B.8
i.Psay.5Z.2
j.Lies.4.12
k.Dav.10.10
l.Psay.5A.24
m.Psay.5A.31
n.Psay.5Q.5
o.Kin.4.1
p.Grk.13.20
q.Yks.144.11-12
r.Psom.8.1-6
Psom.23.11
s.Zig.6.3
t.Zig.9.2
u.Kens.36.3
v.Ext.48.19
w.Boul.15.10-11
x.Grk.16.5
y.Ed.27.5
14 And if Noah couldn't see that,
15 mHe must have a screw loose,
16 Or words to that effect.
17 And so nNoah built his own ark,
18 And filled it with two of each kind of animal that wasn't too big to fit inside,
19 Such as odinosaurs,
20 Which were too big to fit,
21 Apparently,
22 And didn't get to go,
23 Although the ark went all the way to pMount Ararat,
24 Thus saving Noah,
25 And making it possible for God to keep showing his love in the oddest possible ways.

CHAPTER 6
1 And so it came to pas that Noah qbegat a son,
2 Who begat a son,
3 And so forth,
4 And so on,
5 Until there were a lot of people again,
6 Which convinced God that it was rtime to destroy some more things,
7 sSuch as Sodom and Gomorrah,
8 tWhich wasn't really God's fault,
9 Because he warned everybody not to try dating his uAngels,
10 vWhich they went ahead and tried anyway,
11 Resulting in lots of fire and brimstone from wyou know who,
12 Which didn't kill xLot,
13 Because yLot didn't try to date any Angels,