CHAPTER 261 aBut a lot of you believed in God too,
2 And you tried as hard as you could to figure out the Christian thing,
3 Which worked pretty well,
4 bBecause you figured it a lot like the whole country did,
5 Meaning that there were times you were on your best behavior because Jesus was probably watching,
6 Like when you got married and had babies and dinner at Mom's house and card games with your best buddies,
7 cAnd then there were times when turn the other cheek just doesn't cut it,
8 Because that isn't real life,
9 And sometimes you just put the Bible on the shelf and go take care of business,
10 dAnd getting it over with in a big hurry is the best you can do for Jesus at times like that,
11 Because He isn't here in Kensington when your wife's new boyfriend slashes the tires,
12 And how's he going to learn not to do that, and be more like Jesus would be, if you don't teach him the price of being a dirty homewrecking animal?
13 eAnd if that was such a wrong reading of Jesus, then how come the country kept giving you a whistle every fifty years or so,
14 fAnd sending you off to teach some uppity jerk a serious Kensingtonian lesson?
15 What is it that you figured wrong?
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CHAPTER 271 Well, you just never figured that they would forget everything,
2 Especially the part about how everybody contributes in his own way,
3 And all the ways add a little something to the mix,
4 gIncluding even Kensingtonians,
5 hNot to mention everybody else.
6 And who would have figured that they'd forget everybody isn't and shouldn't be the same,
7 Because some are better at one thing, and some are better at the other,
8 Which is why everybody really kind of needs everybody else,
9 Just like you depend on the guy who was in charge of building the Ben Franklin,
10 Even if he was a Mainliner or a Drexelite or an uppity Broad Streeter,
11 Because you know that's not what Kensingtonians do best,
12 iAlthough maybe you'd actually kind of like it if your son could learn how to build the Ben Franklin,
13 jBecause maybe then he wouldn't have to grow up like you did,
14 Scarred by gang fights before he was old enough to get his first tattoo.
CHAPTER 281 But they did forget.
2 Everything.
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