2 They'll remember it,
3 aAnd have a lot of them on hand at all times.
4 If you ever mentioned something called indulgences,
5 They'll remember it,
6 bAnd sell them to everyone who has the money.
7 If you ever mentioned something called riches,
8 They'll remember it,
9 cAnd have them in great abundance,
10 Forever.
11 Nor is this all they'll remember.
CHAPTER 101 If you ever mentioned something called the dHoly Grail,
2 They will remember it,
3 eAnd shed millions of gallons of blood to get it,
4 fWithout much success.
5 If you ever mentioned something called an ginquisition,
6 They'll remember it,
7 hAnd have one,
8 iAnd burn and torture and kill thousands of people in it,
9 jWith a great deal of success.
10 And if you ever mentioned something about being infallible,
11 They'll remember it,
12 kAnd claim they are that,
13 In your name,
14 Which is also about par,
15 Unless it's a lbirdie.
CHAPTER 111 Nor will this be the only church with a great memory.
2 Other churches will come along,
3 And remember other things you mentioned.
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4 mFor example, one of the churches will remember that you hate people who look nice,
5 And condemn people to hell if their clothes aren't ugly.
6 nOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who consume alcohol in any form,
7 And condemn people to hell for drinking.
8 oOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who dance,
9 And condemn people to hell for dancing.
10 pOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who read prayers,
11 And condemn people to hell for using a prayer book.
12 qOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who aren't completely immersed during baptism,
13 And condemn people to hell for being baptized on the forehead.
14 rOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who don't speak in tongues and roll around on the floor,
15 And condemn people to hell for behaving modestly in church.
16 sOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who aren't expecting you to come back and destroy the world next week,
17 And condemn people to hell for not sitting on the edge of the chair while they wait for you.
18 tOne of the churches will remember that you hate people who worship you in the company of ex-slaves, who should never really have been freed anyway,
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