57 aBecause they're so darned peaceful and loving at heart,
58 When a bpickup truck comes out of nowhere and shoots them to death,
59 cFor no reason at all,
60 Which when you think about it,
61 Is just exactly like modern life in America,
62 And says it all.
CHAPTER 571 Yes, there will be many great movies in the age to come,
2 And many many great parts for the glittering mega-stars of the future,
3 Including parts for beautiful, idealistic women who aren't going to stand for all the lies anymore,
4 Which will be played by a brilliant actress named dJoan Fonda,
5 And parts for handsome idealistic men who aren't going to stand for all the lies anymore,
6 Which will be played by a brilliant actor named eRobert Redwood,
7 And parts for attractive, sensitive idealists who keep thinking that good intentions might save them somehow,
8 Which will be played by fJohn Void,
9 And parts for confused idealists who don't have any idea what to do about anything,
10 Which will be played by gDustin Hopeless,
11 And parts for idealists who foam at the mouth about all the lies and may or may not get gunned down in the last reel,
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12 Which will be played by hDustin Pacino,
13 And parts for nonconformist idealists who might seem kind of crazy if the world weren't so utterly insane,
14 Which will be played by iDennis Hippy,
15 And parts for charismatic idealists who do all kinds of wild eccentric things just to keep their sanity in a world full of lies,
16 Which will be played by jMalcolm McBowel,
17 And parts for good-looking but callow idealists who don't seem to understand that the lies really can kill you,
18 Which will be played by kPaul Fonda,
19 And parts for ironically taciturn idealists who are giving a lot of thought to becoming realists instead,
20 Which will be played by lDonald Mutherland,
21 And parts for acid-tongued realists who aren't going to stand for all the lies anymore,
22 Which will be played by mJack Nickerson,
23 And parts for drolly intellectual realists who just sigh and make witty remarks when they hear all the lies again,
24 Which will be played by nElliott Mould,
25 And parts for no-nonsense female realists who have learned to take what they can get in spite of all the lies,
26 Which will be played by oFate Underway,
27 And parts for exceptionally sexy realists who make love seven or eight times a day instead of listening to all the lies,
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