12 aAnd will always get even with the enemy,
13 No matter how much it costs,
14 Which could turn out to be a lot,
15 Because these will all be big budget pictures.
CHAPTER 321 There will also be a war movie called 'The Big Casablanca,'
2 Which will be great,
3 Because it will show everybody how romantic it is to be an American expatriate named Marlowe,
4 As played by bHumphrey Bogart,
5 Who has to beat the Nazis by getting the cMaltese falcon away from dSydney Greenstreet,
6 While wearing a trench coat instead of a uniform,
7 Which isn't easy,
8 Especially when you're being distracted by eIngrid Bergman,
9 fWho is so vulnerable and desirable that she can make you propose silly gtoasts in Paris,
10 And even make you look like you could cry at the hrailroad station,
11 Except that Humphrey Bogart never cries,
12 Ever,
13 iJust like all American men,
14 And will get over it eventually,
15 jEven if it takes a few drinks to do it,
16 And even if kSam has to play lit again every once in a while,
17 Until some mfemale Frog sings the Marseillaise and reminds everyone that nnothing amounts to a hill of beans in this world except beating the Krauts,
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18 Because if you don't do the right thing,
19 oYou might not regret it today or tomorrow,
20 pBut you'll regret it soon and for the rest of your life,
21 qWhich is why Ingrid will have to get on the plane for Lisbon,
22 rAnd why Humphrey will join the resistance with his suave French pal,
23 As played by sClaude Rains,
24 Thus proving why the Krauts won't have a tprayer of winning the war,
25 uEspecially with John Wayne handling all the rough stuff in both theaters,
26 vAnd Humphrey handling all the tricky undercover stuff in his trenchcoat.
CHAPTER 331 But Hollywood won't take a vacation even after John and Humphrey have won the war,
2 Which they will do, of course,
3 With just a little bit of help from a very photogenic B-17 crew made up of an wItalian from the South Bronx, a blond xfarm boy from Iowa, a short yJew from Brooklyn, a zcracker from Alabama, and a brawling aaMick from Boston.
4 In fact, motion-picture directors will start making more movies about real problems that maybe can't be completely solved in an hour and a half,
5 bbSuch as the problems the B-17 crew will have when it comes home,
6 And can't find a job,
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