12 aAnd especially munitions factories.
13 bAll of this obvious Kraut superiority convinced the new Kraut emperor,
14 Whose name was cKaiser Wilhelm,
15 That it was time to start a big world war,
16 dThe bigger the better,
17 And settle everything once and for all.
CHAPTER 231 The Kaiser waited for an appropriate reason to start a war, of course,
2 Because it wouldn't do to start a world war for no reason at all,
3 And so he waited patiently,
4 Until a Serbo-Croatian maniac assassinated the earchduke Ferdinand,
5 Of Austria,
6 fWhich had always been one of Germany's dearest friends,
7 gAnd meant that Germany had no choice but to invade France,
8 And then conquer the world.
CHAPTER 241 With the help of their close friends the Austrians, Germany came very close to winning World War I,
2 Or the Great War, as it was called then,
3 In the days before anyone knew that you had to number them.
4 hUnfortunately, the Krauts' brilliant strategy of sweeping through Belgium into the north of France got spoiled by typical French stupidity,
5 Since the French had been too dumb to realize that the Krauts were supposed to make the first move,
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6 iAnd launched a silly attack on Germany that caused a lot of embarrassing scrambling around,
7 jBefore things settled down into trench warfare,
8 Which the Krauts got blamed for,
9 But wasn't their fault,
10 kEspecially the part about poison gas,
11 lBecause how else can you kill a Frog that's too chicken to get out of his trench and fight like a man?
CHAPTER 251 mMeanwhile, because the Russians hadn't prevented the assassination of the archduke,
2 They had to be punished too,
3 nWhich meant the Krauts had to go to war against millions of unarmed Russian peasants in the snow,
4 oAnd use up lots of good munitions that might have changed the pbalance of power on the western front,
5 Where the Krauts were now fighting against the qBrits and rItalians as well as the French.
6 sBesides, the Great War had gotten so big that the munitions manufacturers in Germany were also having to supply arms to other Kraut armies and allies in other parts of the world,
7 Frequently at a tdiscount,
8 Which was completely unexpected,
9 And hurt profits so much that Germany began to experience some serious economic hardships,
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