2 Which is why the Brits had so much confidence in their newest military hero,
3 An idiot named aMontgomery,
4 bWho did everything possible to make the war bloodier, sweatier, and more tearful than it was already,
5 But was consistently frustrated by the Americans,
6 Who always wanted to do things their way,
7 cAnd ultimately did.
8 Having recognized that the dGermans and eJapanese were determined to do everything the big way,
9 fThe Americans decided to do everything even bigger,
10 gWhich had never occurred to the Brits,
11 hAnd so the Americans built a very big force consisting of very big planes, very big ships, and very big armies,
12 And used them to fight a lot of very big battles,
13 Like iAnzio and jD-Day and the kBattle of the Bulge and so forth,
14 lAnd do a lot of very big damage to German cities and factories,
15 mAnd to Japanese cities and factories,
16 nUntil the Germans gave up,
17 oAnd the Japanese were distinctly nervous.
CHAPTER 551 pThen the Americans dropped a very very big bomb on Japan,
2 qAnd another one a couple of days later,
3 rWhich convinced the Japanese to give up too,
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4 And made everything okay,
5 Except that it didn't.
CHAPTER 561 Unfortunately, things were not okay in Great Britain anymore.
2 sThe Germans had knocked down a lot of their cities,
3 tAnd the Germans and Japanese had killed a lot of their troops,
4 And it seemed to a lot of Brits that duty, honor, and tradition were getting to be pretty expensive and outdated luxuries,
5 uEspecially since they had all grown pretty fond of being above it all,
6 Before Hitler came along and messed things up,
7 And now they were no longer sure of anything,
8 vExcept that the hard way had become too hard,
9 And the big way was too big for a wlittle country,
10 xEspecially now that the United States and the Soviet Union had started throwing their weight around in such an ill-bred fashion.
11 yAnd so the Brits politely asked Winston Churchill to go away,
12 Immediately,
13 Or sooner than that, if possible,
14 And then politely dismantled the bankrupt remains of their empire,
15 zStuck the White Man's Burden on a shelf,
16 aaAnd stopped trying to be a Chosen Nation altogether,
17 bbSo that they could devote all their time to being above it all.
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