19 And that's not all you'll get for your aten dollars,
20 Because you'll also learn how to pick an academic bspecialty so narrow that no one will ever ask you the cbig hard questions,
21 Like "What does it all mean?"
22 And "Why should we go on for another lousy day?"
23 Because you don't need your life complicated with a lot of esoteric paradoxes,
24 Especially when it's so much easier to sit back in your dcorduroy jacket,
25 eAnd just pretend to have the lowdown on everything,
26 Which is still another of the amazing things you'll learn for the paltry sum of ften dollars.
27 For example, when you send in your gten dollars, you'll also receive dozens of useful tips about how to use the intellectual's most feared communications weapons, namely,
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28 hRidicule,
29 iAnd contempt,
30 Which are all you'll ever need to dismiss everybody else's ideas,
31 Without thinking about them at all,
32 Just like thousands of great intellectuals have done before you,
33 As they worked their way up the chain.
34 Can you afford to be without the 'Intellectual Lifestyle Handbook'?
35 Not if you ever expect to get tenure, that's for sure.
36 So mail your letter today,
37 jAnd don't forget the ten dollars!
38 Comprenez, mes cher amies?
39 Très très bien.
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