|21 Blame your aoffice nurses for not briefing you on significant details,
22 Whether they do or not,
23 bUntil absolutely everybody is convinced that you are an obnoxious perfectionist who never misses a trick,
24 cSo that they will catch most of your mistakes for you,
25 Before you make them,
26 Without thinking about it at all.
27 And if you happen to kill one by daccident, see to it that you inform the family at once about the patient's culpability for his own demise,
28 eBecause he was overweight,
29 fOr a smoker,
30 gOr a quitter,
31 hOr too stingy to spring for all the high-margin tests you twisted his arm to get.
32 If people still try to blame you for ibig bucks, there is also a last resort,
33 Which is to break down and confess that you have been receiving too much Consolation,
34 Because you are a physician,
35 And the jstress got to you,
36 And you couldn't help it,
37 And you're really sorry,
38 And you'll commit yourself at once for rehabilitation,
39 kAnd how about another chance?
CHAPTER 111 Yes, if you're an income-oriented physician, Consolation can play a big and helpful role in your life,
||2 And it's so easy to accept Harry into your life too,
3 lBecause all you have to do is wash your hands,
4 Of everything,
5 Which is something physicians do several times a day,
6 So what's the big mdeal?
7 nCome to Harry.
8 He's got the goods for what ails you,
9 oBecause a Harrier is a Harrier is a Harrier,
10 Whether he signs a pHypocratic Oath or not,
11 qAnd Harry knows Harriers better than they know themselves,
12 Which is why he told me to include enough Consolation Release Forms for all of you,
13 So there's no need to be pushing and shoving in line, everybody.
14 You'll find a bunch of ten year-old-rmagazines in the waiting room,
15 And we'll get to you as fast as we can,
16 Without thinking about it at all.
17 Until then,
18 Just remember our general prophylactic prescription for sclassically trained Harriers everywhere, namely,
20 Don't you feel better already?