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31 aWell, that's because there aren't any Others in the Suburbs,
32 bWhich is maybe why the little Striplings admire them so much,
33 Not to mention Dick and Jane,
34 Although I suppose we really Should,
35 Because they're just So mentionable,
36 Somehow.

CHAPTER T
1 T is for Tests.
2 Which have to be Taken by the little Twerps,
3 Before Dick and Jane can Turn them over to some other Teacher,
4 For another Try at the Three R's.
5 See Dick and Jane grading cTests?
6 How Tolerant they are of Tiny little errors on the True/false section!
7 How Tactful they are in not Tearing up those Tragic little essays!
8 How Tempted they are to pass everyone!
9 Well, isn't that Terrific?
10 dWhat Talented Teachers Dick and Jane must be!
11 As it Turns out, not even one of the little Thugs will have to repeat the Term!

CHAPTER U
1 U is for the eUnion,
2 Which is the only entity in the fUniverse that really Understands Dick and Jane's needs,
a.Ext.52.16
b.Carl.10.12
c.Cen.26.1-9
d.Hill.G.1-2
e.Adam.28.1-10
f.Psay.5U.1-23
g.Psong.13.1-5
h.Psay.5S.7
i.Mawr.15.13-18
j.Psong.16.1-3
k.Ira.11.5
l.Barb.3.1-5
m.Hill.H.9-12
n.Hill.S.21-23
o.Swar.PS.14-15
Ext.25.1
p.Kens.12.11-15
3 And how truly Unfortunate it is that everyone else is Usually so Uncooperative,
4 gWhich is why Dick and Jane are so Underpaid,
5 And so Under-appreciated,
6 And so likely to Undertake another hstrike,
7 Unless the school board takes their idemands Under advisement,
8 jAnd Underwrites another huge raise.
9 See the school board,
10 Under the gun?
11 See Dick and Jane,
12 Under a kpicket sign?
13 See all the Harriers,
14 Under the sun?

CHAPTER V
1 V is for lVandalism.
2 Which is the only skill the little Varmints excel at,
3 Unless you count mVenereal pursuits,
4 And nVarsity sports,
5 Which is why it's so Very important not to be too Vindictive about punishing them,
6 Because if you Value your children,
7 It's more Virtuous to Validate their good behavior than to Victimize them for petty Villainies,
8 Especially if you don't want them to Vivisect your oVolvo,
9 Because V is also for pVengeance,
10 If you're a Harrier.

CHAPTER W
1 W is for the World,
2 Which all the little Whining Weasels couldn't know less about,