|2 And barbarians who called themselves aOstrogoths,
3 And barbarians who called themselves bVisigoths,
4 And barbarians who called themselves cVandals,
5 Which suggests that there were also barbarians who called themselves dOstrovandals,
6 And eVisivandals,
7 Or should have been, anyway.
8 And there were barbarians called fFranks,
9 gAnd barbarians called Huns,
10 hAnd barbarians called Angles,
11 iAnd barbarians called Saxons,
12 And there may also have been barbarians called Ostrofranks, and Visihuns, and Ostrosaxons, and Visiangles,
13 And vice versa,
14 Though there's no way to prove it,
15 Because none of them were very good at writing things down,
16 Since that leads to jhistory,
17 And kcivilization,
18 lEt cetera,
19 Which just isn't necessary when all you want to do is smash things up.
CHAPTER 31 Some barbarians specialized in sacking and pillaging,
2 And others in raping and looting,
3 Each according to his taste.
4 But it was the mVandals who first thought of smashing things up as a way to make a living,
5 Which is why they named this profession after themselves,
||6 nBecause even though they were barbarians, they weren't stupid.
7 When the other barbarians saw how much fun it was, they started smashing things up too,
8 oWhich is how the barbarians managed to smash the Roman Empire,
9 To pieces.
CHAPTER 41 pAfter there wasn't a Roman Empire to smash up anymore, the barbarians had to find a new way to make a living.
2 So they decided to smash up some other places,
3 Like qBritain, and rFrance, and sGermany.
4 But it turned out that there weren't too many places like Rome,
5 Which could be smashed up again and again,
6 And again and again,
7 tAnd again,
8 Unless Vikings were involved, that is,
9 uBecause there wasn't anyplace so tiny or remote or worthless that the Vikings wouldn't find some way to get to it,
10 And smash it up again and again,
11 And again and again,
12 And again,
13 vJust for the pure joyous fun of it all.
14 But the wothers eventually got tired of running around all the time,
15 And finally decided to stay where they were for a while,
16 And try being xNations,
17 Which is why we have yEurope,