|6 aExcept they all knew enough about the Brit sense of fair play to recognize that you could only take an extreme position without giving any reasons if you were a Brit,
7 Which they were kind of saying they weren't,
8 bSince Brits pay their taxes.
9 This presented the colonists with a dilemma,
10 Which was resolved by their discovery that they were actually objecting to the tea tax on principle,
11 cMeaning that they were opposed to the concept of taxation without representation,
12 Whatever that was,
13 And could, quite dhonorably, refuse to be subjected to Brit tyranny,
16 eWhat America was all about was freedom from tyranny.
17 fWhich explains how gPatrick Henry got the idea about h"Give me liberty or give me death."
CHAPTER 91 iThe Brits did not buy the freedom from tyranny angle,
2 jWhich forced the colonists to articulate it more plainly,
3 Resulting in a document called the kDeclaration of Independence,
4 Which by an odd coincidence was published on lIndependence Day,
5 And upset the Brits no end.
6 mIn fact, the Brits declared war on the colonies,
7 But then had to wait around for a while while the colonists put together a ncontinental congress,
||8 And passed a tax to pay for the army,
9 And then picked a ogeneral to lead the army,
10 Who was named pGeorge Washington.
CHAPTER 101 George Washington had a lot of army experience,
2 qHaving been in the Brit army during the French and Indian War,
3 And had rwooden teeth too,
4 Which he made out of a cherry tree that he had schopped down so he could tell his father about it,
5 Proving that he was honest,
6 And the father of his country.
7 Because of his Brit military training, Washington believed in doing things the thard way,
8 Which is why he spent winters at uValley Forge,
9 Where the troops had nothing to eat,
10 And no shoes for their feet,
11 And no coverings for their heads,
12 vExcept the regulation white bandage with a picturesque bloodstain on the front.
14 Washington decided to attack the Brits in the dead of winter,
15 wAnd therefore crossed the Delaware,
16 xStanding up the whole way,
17 Until they reached yTrenton and surprised the British army,
18 By singing z"Yankee Doodle" as loud as they could,
19 aaWhich explains why the entire world now calls the Americans Yankees.