|10 Decided to arule it.
11 This is their bstory.
CHAPTER 21 The Spaniards arrived in North America first,
2 cAnd settled in Florida,
3 Which had a nice warm climate,
4 And not much else.
5 Several years later,
6 dEnglish settlers landed in Virginia and started a colony called eJamestown,
7 Which had everything it needed to establish a solid English presence in North America,
8 Except money, provisions, military support, and adequate numbers of settlers.
CHAPTER 31 A few years later, fPuritans called pilgrims started arriving along the northeast coast of the North American continent,
2 Having been requested to leave England,
3 Which already had enough Puritans of its own,
4 In fact, more than enough.
5 gThe Puritans were exceptionally fond of misery,
6 Which is why they settled in New England,
7 hWhere the weather was almost as bad as it was back home,
8 And where there were plenty of naked iheathen Indians to offend their morals,
9 Which weren't hard to offend anyway,
10 jSince anything that might remotely be considered fun is immoral to a Puritan,
||11 kExcept for public execution of heretics,
12 lWhich is fun,
13 But doesn't count,
14 Because Puritans never laugh at executions,
15 No matter how much fun they're having.
CHAPTER 41 mThanks to all the fun the Brits were having with various forms of religious persecution,
2 Quite a number of new colonies got started in North America over the next few decades,
3 Including colonies of persecuted nQuakers in Pennsylvania and New Jersey,
4 oColonies of persecuted Catholics in Maryland,
5 pAnd a lot more Puritans,
6 Who came over to New England in droves,
7 On a ferry service called the Mayflower.
CHAPTER 51 Meanwhile, the Spanish had established colonies in California and Texas,
2 qIn addition to rFlorida,
3 sAnd the French had claimed most of the upper and middle part of North America,
4 And the southern portions of North America were filling up with settlers from England and Ireland,
5 tPlus a lot of slaves shipped over in chains from Africa,
6 uSo that they could help build enormous cotton and tobacco plantations for their new masters,
7 Who had come to America to be free.